I'd already known that you were seeing someone for some time, having seen your update on fb. I would be lying if I said I didn't think into it - I did, but in a healthy dose, I suppose. I sincerely wished for your happiness. That you could trust and love again after how I'd seen the ugly and broken pieces of you. She must be a special girl, I thought to myself. She's got to have something that you really want in your life. I thought about these things after I saw that picture - I think it was a good few months back.
But I still found it a little hard to breathe when I heard, for the first time, an account of somebody seeing you. And seeing you with a girl, whom I suppose would be her. I caught my breath a little bit, trying to be nonchalant about it and behave as per normal. It's an okay kind of melancholy, I suppose. Taking in that you've moved on from yourself and the hurt from before.
I may never be able to not associate you with some sort of heartbroken feeling in my chest, ever.
You were someone whom I really felt something with. Something different and special.
我曾经真的真的很喜欢你。
I'm happy for you.
Even without the closure I once needed so badly. Even without my expression of blessing. I'm happy for you.
May my happiness come soon too.
XX
