" Four years ago, sometime in the third quarter of the year, I got my heart broken. We were young, we were naive. We were ignorant. But still, I got my heart broken. It was short, but not entirely sweet. Yes, there were significant events throughout the three weeks, but only one vivid enough to call a memory. It was, what made me love the rain, only with the right company. It was, what made me love window seats, and basketball games. It was, my first time feeling happy, despite waiting four hours only to have you gone the next. But all in all, it was, nothing but a passing phase. Despite so.. I wouldn't say that it was love, but it was definitely, where and when I learned enough not to fall in it too easily.
As a new year was approaching, I was introduced to the next person who has made, probably the most significant impact on my Chung Cheng life, next to the all the friendships I've bridged. An entire year.. of being so close, but not close enough. The crazy, incessant ringing of the cellphone indicating a text, half a minute after I sent one over. The late-night conversations and conferences at times, talking and talking till the battery went dead. And.. the very first time I was sent home. All these and more, for those twelve months. "It's not that our love died, just never really bloomed." Couldn't put it in better words. I was lost for quite a bit, when you left. Attempts to push you out of my head.. let's just say it didn't always pay off. There were good, and bad times. But gradually, I convinced myself that there was no point - if it were to happen, it would've happened a long, long time ago. That was the second time, but it was the hardest, most painful, and most heart aching period I had ever been through.
The year passed and I moved on to upper sec. Random people passing in and out of my life, some I hardly even recall. A handful I thought were possibilities, but somehow or another, we lost it. It was mostly on my part - being uninitiated and inexpressive. Nonetheless, each and every one of those short-lived, relationships, taught me what to seek for, and what to wait for, in love.
In the last year, I unwittingly fell for someone I should never, ever harbour hope on. Till now, I still have not let go, but slowly, I will. The misery I've gone through so far.. I don't want it to press on.
Moving on to the now.
New school, new life. Correction, new people in my life. Put it this way, there are ideal people at the moment, but we'll leave everything to nature's course. But I've learnt, and I will, fight for my own happiness now. "
